Connections – We Want ‘Em, We Crave ‘Em – But, Do We Know What They Look Like?

Yesterday a dear friend and I, for over 30 years (those are the sweetest), sat in a Starbucks with our steaming 16 ounce lattes, and talked about that ever illusive – hard to catch thing – connection.

We both admit – we crave connections – think about connections – want and plan for more connections.

It’s kind of like chocolate for me – I can’t seem to get enough.

I not only crave connections, I expect them.

If I am in a group setting with others – no matter where (work, church, home), I expect to make a meaningful connection. I expect some type of emotional attachment – being heard and loved for who I am.

“I define connection as the energy that exists between people when they feel seen, heard, and valued; when they can give and receive without judgment; and when they derive sustenance and strength from the relationship.” ― Brené Brown

Connections matter.

If I am honest with myself, my picture of connectedness might look like an episode from the TV show “Friends”.

My friends would always be available for my every need (they live across the hall, right?), our conversations would be witty, these friends would be attractive, not needy, and time with them would always hit my emotional happy place.

Not…. what my life looks like!

First off, I crave connections, but I find that in social gatherings, I often leave feeling disconnected, somehow ‘off’.

There have been more instances than I care to count when I’ve felt alone in places that I’d expected to have comradery and fellowship.

Connections for me often come in unexpected places, with people I don’t expect to connect to.

Connections are like the bubbles pouring out of the bubble machine on the curb at my local art store – they float all around me, touching me with their beauty – but when I reach out to grab one – they pop and disappear in my hand.

Connections can’t be ordered up – like our favorite coffee drink.

They happen when they happen – like that ever elusive bubble that I can’t seem to catch as it floats by me.

You and I are clearly made for connections – we seem hardwired with a drive to connect. This is no freak accident of nature. But, how do we meet our need to connect?

I think we all want a simple “how to” answer – to make our connections ‘work’ – to meet and fill our needs.

What I’m wondering – is if that small ache we feel – that ever present hunger for connections, is what Solomon described as: “eternity in the heart of man” (Ecc. 3;11).

Perhaps, the something more we crave – is a God made hole that can only be filled at the end of time, when God’s ultimate plan – oneness – the diversity of mankind melded into a heavenly whole, will be unraveled and displayed in all its splendor.

 [tweetthis display_mode=”box”]Connection and the working of it – a mystery.[/tweetthis]

A mystery of God’s design, God’s handiwork. A great mystery, with great purpose – part of His will and design.

 

“God made known to us the mystery of His will, according to His good pleasure, which He purposed in Christ…to bring unity to all things in heaven and on earth under Christ.”  -Ephesians 1:9

 

The best description I can find, of a “how-to” approach to intention and purpose connection is this:

“‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” 

Luke 10:27

 

My job – loving God and loving others.

God’s job – bringing about His ultimate plan – His design for our hearts – the unsolvable mystery – oneness.

 

**Lord, we look to you, the Author of Life, the Designer Extraordinaire, the One whose purposes and plans never fail. Lord, fill the deep places in us that crave connection. Lead us – in our weakness, in our wants, in this our heart’s desire – to connect. We trust in you.

This post was one I published a year ago, which I decided to recycle as this topic is near and dear to my heart – always a trending topic for me!

Linking up with: Holley’s CoffeeformyHeart, Lyli’s ThoughtProvokingThursday

Reflections on 2016 – The Year of Big Events

**I’m tucking in an extra post this week because it’s time for Emily P. Freeman’s ‘What We’ve Learned’ link up. You might enjoy taking a look here.

This year was marked by Big Events for our family, so I’m starting with a review and, then, what it’s meant to me. These have been life changers – they’ve made seismic shifts in the terrain of our family life.

I’ll start with The Big Event – probably better named ‘The Blessed Event‘. This past July my eldest daughter married the love of her life, Sean. It was a once in a lifetime day, as I’m sure many of you’ve experienced, and it not only blessed our family, it altered us, somehow.

kristin-and-sean-with-ice-cream-cones-at-wedding-cut-version

Most obvious, our daughter-filled family now has a son. We’ve added testosterone, much humor and wit, along with a generous spirit. Not a bad addition. [Read more…]

It Doesn’t Take Much to Bring Me Down in Life

I still remember the moment, standing in the crowded hallway outside my daughter’s elementary school classroom and overhearing three women across the hall discussing plans for a party for one of their daughters, one my daughter didn’t get invited to. One of the mom’s glanced up as they were talking, caught my eye and quickly looked away, their discussion ending abruptly.

Have you ever experienced being excluded from the group or the event? It seems such a small thing. But, small things can have a big impact on my daily walk.

I don’t expect to be bothered by the small stuff. I’d like to think I’m bigger than that.

I’d like to believe I am somehow above the petty irritants in life – things like long lines, traffic jams, people who won’t stop talking (even at church events), meetings that go on and on, appointments that are hard to make – life’s little stuff can be hard to deal with.

It reminds me, it doesn’t take much to bring me down in life.

I’d like to say, only big things bring me down – monsters like ‘911’ terrorist attacks, school bombings, cancer, the grief of war – the stuff that makes even soldiers weep.

But, truthfully, it doesn’t take much to bring me down. [Read more…]

The Gift of Your Authentic Self. Will You Receive It?

“There is a universal tendency to want to be someone else.” (Parker Palmer, “Let Your Life Speak”)

I’ve wanted it. To be like someone else.

Or, at the very least, I’ve looked over there, at someone else’s life, and thought – that looks kinda easy – or kinda nice.

I wouldn’t mind that life – or, that house – or, that income – or that gifting. [Read more…]

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